When one speaks to an immature Christian with the intent of causing them to grow to maturity, it is mandatory that one speak the truth, but it must be done with love. Both are essential for the growth of immature Christians (Ephesians 4:15).
After talking about how Christians need to grow so they are not like children “tossed here and there” like a watercraft “by [the] waves” of any doctrine that comes along, Paul addresses how one should speak these truths to another. He says it must be done with love.
The meaning of the word “love,” as Paul uses it here, is that of having the best interest of the person in mind. The speaker is filled with kindness because they are not seeking to win an argument, but rather a soul. Seeing the unrighteousness in the life of another person, the speaker wants to correct it so the person can “grow up in all aspects to Christ” to mature into a full-grown image of Christ.
Some see correcting other people as not being a loving person. They consider pointing out people’s faults as socially unacceptable. However, that idea is contrary to the context of Paul’s writing in this passage. Helping people to grow by pointing out their shortcomings is a very loving thing to do.
One of the reasons people are hesitant to help people mature is their lack of confidence that they can speak the truth to someone in such a way that will actually cause them to make the necessary changes in their lives. They are afraid they will say something that will be taken the wrong way and it will “drive people away from Christ.” While this is a possibility, we must think positively; we must focus on trying to help the immature to grow into “the image of Christ.” We must think it can be done! We can say something that will change someone’s life.
One of the characteristics of love, as described by Paul, is that love “does not seek its own” (1 Corinthians 13:5). When applying this passage our efforts are not to prove how knowledgeable in the Scriptures we are, but rather to focus on helping the other person. We are not seeking to prove we are right, but rather to help the other person see what is right. It is about them and not about the speaker.
It is of utmost importance that a teacher of God’s word must speak the truth in all situations. Equally important, we must do it with love. The focus of our attention is to help those listening to us to mature so they are daily living God’s way.
Carlton G. McPeak (carlton_mc@msn.com) is an evangelist working in the Florida Gateway region. Scriptural quotations from the NASB.
